And to that I am working on a new "mantra" of sorts.

"Im here. Im gay. Im me. Im a man. Im worth it. If u have a problem with it, Fuck Off This is MY time. And I WILL be Me!"

It might sound arrogant but ya know what - so what. I have spent so much time trying to be what everyone things I should be - to please and not ruffle. To just blend and be the status quo - and in that you know what I found...

Im not there... its not me. So that didn't work. Time for a new approach.

I know I am going to have my depressive days and those days I don't feel this at all but I am hell bent, fuck I mean I am me. Who else can I be. This is life - learning to be who we are in our own skin and learning to love it the rest of the worlds opinion be damned.

So lets see where it goes shall we?

C'mon its gonna be fun - who doesn't love to watch a train wreck and to see the progress of things being built.. well ladies and gents this is two things in one.

And step one - all you people who keep tellin me Im a great guy, a nice guy, fun to be around and all that stuff... ya know what.. YOUR RIGHT! And I am gonna start believing it right now!