Fathers Day.

A day to honor the man or woman who has played the fathering role in our lives. To set aside a special day just for these wonderful people who have helped to guide us, shape us, respect us, and teach us to respect not just others but the world around us.

Fathers come in all shapes and sizes. Be it the single mother raising her children, or the single Dad.  Even the nuclear family unit, no matter its current state.

I have been blessed with a Grandfather who has helped to cultivate my interests in how things are built, the work involved. Who encouraged me to build, construct, and keep an eye to details. Details that lead to great quality.

I have furniture in my home now even so far away from TN, that my Grandfather made. And that I, in my ignorant youth, have marred with some deep wounds. But despite my idiocy it is still a beautiful piece, that I use near daily and is set prominently in my home for all to see.

The Grandfather who helped me buy two cars, and helped me to deal with the car lot dealers with his special gift to see through their crap and make them realize they've been had. Those are lessons that I took to heart and used myself not so long ago.

The days spent in his wood shop just messing around, making random things. Little projects, or my just watching him work. These are wonderful memories for me that I will have forever of the grand man whose smile can light a room and turn the world on its end.

From this Grandfather I also got my father. Nifty how that works ain't it :)

My father whom I have learned so many things.

The time we spent just watching M*A*S*H on the couch, sometimes with one or both of us gone off sound asleep. (Of which there is a wonderful picture somewhere) Or the hours spent watching the home renovation shows where I picked up more than a few tips and lessons that I have carried with me and used still today.

The man who bought me my first car, 1987 Cadillac Sedan De'Ville.

He also taught me how to change my own oil. Which I actually did once, before traded cars and never found the oil pan again lol...

Despite the rough times and the distant times, he has always been my father, whom I've loved dearly. Even when I was so angry I couldn't see straight. Sometimes being a teenager is not so good when you really don't know it all when you think you do.

And despite still the physical distance between us, I do miss and love my father. I wish that we had the relationship I see with so many, and I don't really understand why we don't. It seems so simple and plain, yet so complicated and painful at times.

But no matter it all, I love him, he is my father. And has never stopped being there for me, no matter how much of a jack ass I've been in my life.

It's rather amusing to see the 3 of us together, we are such disparate people, yet so similar its comical. From our sense of humor to our instincts and mannerisms. Though I could have passed on the corn/headache thing.. :-P We are each men of very different generations. We have our own beliefs, and trust me we are each DIFFERENT in those beliefs, no two exactly alike, dare I say not even in the same ball park lol.. But it works.

And even in how we act upon these things we are so alike.

The proud Patriarch, who heads the family, the most senior male in my life. I hope to be half the man he is at some point in my life.

The loving Father, who in his own way reaches out to his family. Wanting a closeness and relationship. The man I look up to even when I disagree with him. I dare say we are too much alike sometimes for our own good. :) I offer a full bodied Tim Allen style grunt. You sir, taught me the meaning of doing it yourself, and sometimes even adding more power :)

And me, the grandson and son.

I'm not likely to pass on the family name in my life. In fact someday I may be lucky enough to find someone that I can spend my life with, and even marry, in which its possible I may lose that name. But I will never loose it's meaning or my family.

Each of us have our faults, each have his strengths, I look to these men and take what I can from each to learn in my life and with their "fathering" I hope to be the man that lives up to the lessons I've learned in my life.

DB